Coronavirus Diet – Chapter 9 (Fitness Mania)

I've always envied those people whose compulsion lead them to manic exercise. Of all the ways I've been obsessive & compulsive, it would have been cool if I'd chosen a healthy path instead of the crazy, drunk, screamer route. In my late teens I went through a worshiping Rachel McLish phase. In 1990 I used...

Coronavirus Diet – Chapter 8 (All Laura Ingalls ‘n’shit)

It's like living in a time machine. Little girls are supposed to take typing,and become secretaries, and snag a husband, and have kids, and be a housewife. And housewives are supposed to wake up before everyone else in order to make breakfast. But no one respects that. And housewives are supposed to keep the home...

Coronavirus Diet – Chapter 7 (Zen As Fuck)

...and so, like the asshole I am, I comment with things like, "Am I the only one who's actually losing weight and didn't stock up in junk food?" No one likes it when I do that... which, I have to admit, makes it a little extra fun for me.

Coronavirus Diet – Chapter 6 (That Abyss of Which Nietzsche Wrote)

Several times over the past year, there's been a woman with two young children who walk past my house. I don't know if they live here full time. They're here now, but that doesn't mean anything. I used to see them a lot in the summer, and that used to make me think they were...

Coronavirus Diet Chapter 5 (I guess I lost my job?)

I already have an inferiority complex about my superiority complex. I don't need to be thinking I wished the world would stop - and then it stops! My id cannot handle that kind of coincidence. 

Although to be fair, I'm not really being true to myself if I'm not offending someone.

Coronavirus Diet – Chapter 4 (Happy Does Exist, No, Wait, Happy Isn’t the Right Word)

It's weird to be a manic depressive and be able to maintain a relatively happy day-to-day. In the past, I have known this feeling to be a trap. But since I stopped drinking, it's so much easy to understand what happy is supposed to be like - and more importantly what it's not supposed to...

The Coronavirus Diet – Chapter 3 (How are you doing?)

This is the third chapter three I have started. I'm really hoping to finish this one. It's already sort of written itself in that I wrote it, but it was a message to a friend I'm working with on a charity art auction. She asked me, "How are you doing? (Always a weird question now?"...

The Coronavirus Diet – Chapter 2 (Exacerbation)

For those who have been waiting for a sign that it's time to get their shit together, well... look no further. It is upon you. This is it. The time is now. How you respond, react, behave, and take care now will be the measure of who you are as a person for the rest...

The Coronavirus Diet – Chapter 1: (This is a test)

I've lost six pounds over the last couple weeks, and the only thing I'm doing differently is being even more terrified than usual about eating food prepared by another human.  No fast food, no deliveries, no shirt, no shoes, no service.  Plus I want to keep my immune system healthy, so I'm avoiding refined sugary...

Gross Polluters

I can stay in my lane all I want, but people are still throwing lit cigarette butts out their windows as they pass... they're still driving under the influence, they're still cutting me off, they're still failing to use signals, and riding their brakes. They're still  right on my ass, leaking oil, and openly carrying. They've...